The Upside

You know when the leaves start changing into that perfect shade of orange? When the sun peaks through a cracked window so you can feel the warmth on your skin? When that first sip of hot chocolate hits your tongue and warms your soul?

These are a few of my favorite things.

When life becomes overwhelming, I can close my eyes and imagine this place. I see myself at a creaky wooden table in my favorite coffee shop. The sun reflects off my warm mug as I take in the world around me.

And I feel safe here, because it’s welcomed and familiar.

But the world is not like this.

As much as I’d love to spend my days chatting with kind baristas and journaling about my hearts deepest dreams, this isn’t reality.

Life has trials. Tribulations. Roadblocks. Pitfalls.

Don’t get me wrong, most days are just days. Little routines that help us navigate the hours we have. Sprinkled in are the best kinds of days when you see a puppy on your morning run or spend time reconnecting with an old friend.

And there are days that absolutely bring you to your knees. You cry out to the Lord, “Will it ever get easier?”

Sometimes it’s nothing dramatic or traumatic or anything of the sort. It’s scrolling through an old friends Instagram, remembering the memories you shared together, and wondering if you’ll ever rebuild that bridge.

It’s forgetting to bring your lunch. Having a bad meeting at work. Fighting with your spouse.

Whatever your small thing is, I’m sure you’ve felt this way. Almost as if you have no control of your life, even the mundane parts.

I speak pretty openly in this blog about overcoming the roadblocks of anxiety. But even if you don’t struggle with anxiety on a consistent basis, it’s inevitable that some days will just… suck.

If you’re stuck in a rut, I see you.

If you’re struggling to connect with others, I understand you.

If you feel like you just can’t keep your head above water, I absolutely feel you.

The thing about humans is, we are wanderers. We wander away from God as soon as something else catches our eye. Even the most devout Christians can find themselves far from God and not intentionally.

Sometimes the waves just keep coming, and in your effort to stay afloat, you forget that Jesus can walk on water.

So, how can we overcome these seasons of loneliness? Fear? Anxiety?

Welcome to The Upside. Population: you.

During one of my most recent, debilitating run-ins with anxiety, I reached out to my Mom (like I usually do) but this time I simply couldn’t sugarcoat it. If you know me, you know that sarcasm and dry jokes are the only way I know how to communicate. So, if I start a conversation in regular voice or without some sort of sitcom impression, something is seriously wrong.

This was one of those times.

I couldn’t put my finger on what it was, but I just simply couldn’t breathe. It felt like I was doing everything wrong, and I was completely alone. After she calmed me down, she said to look at the upside.

My brain felt like this: ????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????????????????

If I could see an upside, surely I could talk myself out of this hole, right?

She told me to make a list of things that I could look forward to over the next couple days. After she helped me start my list, my mind began to unravel and my spirit slowly found peace again.

The thing about experiencing the downside is you often don’t know when the upside will come again.

As hard as this may be, you have to create the upside in your own life. Look forward to the smallest thing you can think of, and you’ll be reminded of just how wonderful the world can be.

Pack your favorite lunch. Take a special coffee to work. Wear a comfy pair of socks. Take a walk. Give yourself time to do something silly like watch videos of dogs becoming friends with zoo animals. Or make time to write a letter to a friend.

Whatever it is that you do, start searching for the upside, and the upside will come to you.

The same applies with faith. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Just because we don’t feel the presence of Jesus, doesn’t mean He isn’t walking right beside us.

When we look for Jesus, He is so easy to see in the world. Look at the way birds fly, the smile on a babies face, and the perfect way rain drops land on your windshield.

He is our true upside.

You’re never, ever alone. You are loved. Worthy. Needed.

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If you know someone who struggles with depression or anxiety, please find time to reach out to them this week. You never know who needs a friend.

If you’re struggling this week, find Bible plans for hope at Bible.com.